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NURSING HOME NEGLECT ALMOST KILLED MUM
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In late 2015 I was visiting Mum a couple of times a week,
often we would walk hand-in-hand several kilometers together.
But I happened to neglect visiting for about a week or two
and it was then that I returned to the nursing home
to find her in a wheelchair, catatonic.
The staff sheepishly acknowledged
"Sorry, someone was meant to call you".

I arranged to see one of the house-doctors the next day.
He tried to convince me that such sudden decline in a week
with dementia sufferers is not unusual 
and condescendingly stated that I was in denial.

Paraphrased...
ME: "Have you done any tests?"
HIM: "What kind of tests?"
ME: "Stool, urine, blood"
HIM: "And what do you expect to find?"
ME: "I don't know, you are the doctor!"

I reassigned my Mum to another in-house doctor
who performed a urine test to find Mum had a severe Urinary Tract Infection
and she was rushed to hospital in an ambulance.
For one week she underwent inconclusive tests in the hospital
and her condition did not improve.
Everyone was convinced the end was near.

She was discharged without documentation.
I had to ask the nursing home to insist on obtaining discharge papers.

I then spent whole days every day with her
and fed her puree with a syringe for weeks.
She was suspected of gout (never confirmed) in her knee
so her mobility was limited to a wheelchair.

She developed a pressure sore on her buttocks
(which staff should have kept an eye on and warned me of)
so she then ended up in bed for a fortnight for the sore to recover.
However in bed her leg was not exercised and was allowed to
remain in a bent position so that eventually
"contracture" occured (permanent contaction of her hamstring).
This was foreseeable and perhaps preventable.

Nevertheless a couple of months after the hospitalisation
she recovered her mental faculties and mood
and in fact has not declined mentally since then, surprisingly.
I even feed her solids (staff don't have time to)
and visit every day for two or three horus 
because I noticed many aspects of neglect from staff
(lack of hydration, rushed feeding, no sunlight, no oral care)
Besides, I think the decline for most residents is
directly related to despondency and isolation.

She is now permanently in bed and limited to 30 minutes
in a wheelchair maybe once a week.
Everytime I visit I put her in a huge portable reclining chair
("water-chair")
which I take outside into the garden where I feed her,
she holds my hand almost the entire time (reluctant to let go)
and speaks to me in gibberish (which I respond to in kind).
I can tell from tone if it is a joke she is telling me,
or an anecdote, or a complaint, or philosophising.
We often sing together - wailing like dogs until we both break out
into laughter. I even make electronic music with her.
https://replayscape.com/dementia.htm

I have had too much stress to lodge a formal complaint with
the Medical Board.